Let your Yes be YES and your No be NO

If you lose emotions, you lose decision-making. Emotional regulation is an important component of raising a child. For the growth of moral awareness/conscience:
1) provide clear, consistent rules and rewards
2)swift consequences/feedback
3)explaining the rules.

Every time a child follows  the rules, it is desired to offer praise to the child. When warm accepting parents set clear and reasonable standards for their kids then offer them praise for behaving well, children present strong evidence of an internalized moral construct, usually by age 4 or 5. They are not everything you need in your moral toolkit, but from a statistical point of view, you might not find a good kid without these qualities.

Negative reinforcement trends to strengthen behaviors where as punishments trends to weaken them. Negative reinforcement refers to removing of avoiding aversive stimulus. Research indicates that children learn behaviors  best when they are allowed to make their own mistakes and feel the consequences first-hand.

Here are the guidelines for providing healthy feedback to children:
- The feedback must be firm and not be hurting the child, its a feedback only.
-it must be consistent, every time an undesired behavior is displayed.
-it must be immediate after an undesired behavior is displayed

People respond to feedback which contain cognitive rationale. The rationale consists of explaining why the rule and its consequences exist. Parents providing clear, consistent, and quick feedback that contains reasons for its necessity help their children in assimilating the importance of the feedback.


Research about spanking
A 5-year review of the research literature by a committee of child development specialists sponsored by the American Psychological Association found evidence that spanking caused more behavioral problems than other types of feedback. It produced more aggressive, more depressed, more anxious children with lower IQs. Another 2010 study by Tulane University School of Public Health researcher Catherine Taylor found corroborating results. It found that 3 years old who were spanked more than twice in the month prior to the study were 50% more likely to be aggressive by age 5, even when controlling for differing level of aggression among kids and for maternal depression, alcohol or drug use, or spousal abuse. Author John Medina indicates that spanking is a lazy form of parenting and there are better ways of it.

Summary
-Every child has an innate sense of right and wrong
-Moral behavior develops over time and requires parental guidance
-Parents suggested feedback: realistic, clear expectatio0ns, consistent, immediate consequences for undesirable behavior, praise for good behavior.
-Children tend to assimilate moral behavior when parents explain why a particular behavior is desirable/undesirable and explain the consequences of either actions.